Wednesday, March 26, 2008

It Is Official

[Note to those who don't live in Richmond -- it is Spring Break for all the local schools this week]

I don't think I've mentioned THE HAIRCUT here, so applaud me for suffering in silence. It has been about 5 weeks since the long shag with bangs was requested

and the misshapen 70s tennis star was received.

(Nothing against Ms. King who was working it back in the day)

But like I said -- minimal whining. I spent a small fortune on product to tame the mess and shouldered on. Hair grows back -- NBD.

But today was truly the last straw.

I work for the man in a large multi-building "campus" with several cafeterias. I met a friend for lunch (Hooray for Stephano -- still willing to be seen with me in public!!) in one of the cafeterias I don't go to frequently. Maybe 3 times a month. Point being, I'm not a regular there.

I am however a pleasant sort of gal, so when I got to the front of the line with my overpriced and underwarmed slice of spinach quiche (OMG -- 70s hair is making me eat 70s food!!), I said, "Happy Wednesday" to the checkout lady.

She looked over at me, gave me a big smile and said, "I didn't expect to see you here this week. I thought you'd be home with the kids!"

It is official. I've left 70s tennis star and proceeded directly to soccer mom.


Tell all your single friends, I am NOT wearing mom jeans to match my hair.

XO, JamieSmitten

Friday, March 21, 2008

It's a Lost Art

I learned last year that valet parking at MCV is a crap shoot. Some days the cars flow quickly around the semi-circle and uniformed personnel actually jog to the parking deck to retrieve your car. On bad days, you can sit for a good ten minutes just waiting to pull INTO the semi-circle because cars are just parked haphazardly all over the place while uniformed personnel take breaks. But over the nine months I used the valet parking service regularly, there was only one day that were were delayed because the attendant who could drive a stick shift was on break.

Today? 20 minute wait while an attendant who can drive a stick shift is located. As the key handler informed me apologetically, "sticks are in a meeting right now." Seriously? I hope they were being given raises for actually being able to do their job 100% of the time, because their unskilled peers were dropping the ball.

Doesn't it seem reasonable that applicants for valet positions should be able to drive all cars? Or is it just me?

Tell all your single friends, I prefer a manual transmission and the world can just get over it.

XO, JamieSmitten

Thursday, March 20, 2008

What My Brain Feels Like Today

Now that can't be good, eh? And let me disabuse you (please sir, may I have another!) of the notion that somebody blew my mind. It just went and overloaded on its own. I'm retiring to the couch to watch Lost. Like that will clear my mind. Sigh.

Tell all your single friends, you can OVER think, so keep a spotter handy.

XO, JamieSmitten

Monday, March 17, 2008

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

It's not just about the beer. Well, maybe it is!

Tell all your single friends, I lied when I said I was wearing green underwear.

XO, JamieSmitten

Saturday, March 15, 2008

Make New Friends, But Keep the Old

It is always nice to hear from an old friend -- even when they are doing the digital age drunk dial -- the 2 a.m. IM. (In his defense, it's earlier on the west coast.) He's definitely one of my boys -- inebriated and reaching out to touch someone.

Perhaps to compensate for it being a very slooowwwww IM exchange (one handed typing and such), I got a companion picture. A fond reminder of good times past. M was my first couple shower, my first naked body painting with food, my first cheat on my boyfriend, my first threesome, and probably one or two other firsts I'm forgetting.

Tell all your single friends, memories can warm the heart and the lower bits as well.

XO, JamieSmitten

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

If you're not living on the edge, You take up too much room

That master of musical exchange SwissToni has been more than patient awaiting my review of his Shuffleathon cd. You may remember that I signed up for Shuffleathon 2007, sent off my cd (which caused great trauma for the recipient), and reaped karmic reward by not receiving a cd myself. Into the breach strode SwissT (rhymes with Misty, my pet name for the M of ME) and made me a customized cd. I've had it for well over a month now and it has provided great distraction on road trips between my house and my sister's house where less than pleasant things were happening (post about that sadness below).

So forthwith and with heartfelt apologies to SwissT, my review of SwissToni's Shuffleathon CD for JamieSmitten:

1. History Song by The Good, the Bad & the Queen. I had read a review of this album but never got around to picking it up. Paul Simonon -- so tasty -- how can you go wrong? (Disclaimer: I'm a Strummer girl, but I can appreciate the eye candy that Simonon continues to be) Listening to this song makes me feel like I'm an extra in a Robert Rodriguez film, tossing back tequila shots, and dancing slowly around a Mexican cantina filled with desperado vampires. Love the vibe. Must schedule vacation to Mexico.

2. Our Life is not a Movie or a Maybe by Okkervil River. Another band reviewed/mentioned regularly in Rolling Stone that I've never actually heard. Without looking at the songlist, I would have guessed that David Byrne had finally resurrected the Talking Heads and hooray for that. Peppy, quirky, enjoyable. You can't go wrong with a song that incorporates the lyrics "serenely dribbling." Well, I can't.

3. Suburban Knights by Hard Fi. The first band on the cd that is completely unknown to me. Hey, Hey, Hey, Oh, Oh, Oh, Ah, Ah, Ah, Hey, Hey, Hey. Infectious start and nice guitar bursts. I'm not sure why we're rocking the satellites, but there you have it.

4. Books from Boxes by Maximo Park. Never heard of them. Turns out I'm o.k. with that. Not a bad song, but seems to go on past my attention span. (And no, I've not been diagnosed with A.D.D.) About as exciting as unpacking books from boxes, like the guy says.

5. Golden Skans by Klaxons. Heard this one a few times on KEXP (world's best online radio). I'm not sure I get the fuss. Serviceable music for the decade, but feels like background music to me. I will share that one of my co-workers always includes Klaxons songs on his mix cds so the chicks think he is sensitive. (His words, not mine). At least I think it was the Klaxons, but it might have been another one of his sound-alike bands. Sigh. This is my problem with the Klaxons: indistinguishable.

6. Keep the Car Running by Arcade Fire. The first time I listened to this cd was in my car on the road. When this song came on, I scrambled quickly for the cd case which had become intermingled with the dog biscuits, cell phone, jacket, purse, and bag of yogurt covered raisins in the passenger seat. Scrambled, I did, because I couldn't believe that SwissT had included the song On the Dark Side by John Cafferty and Beaver Brown Band (from the Eddie and the Cruisers soundtrack). What? Arcade Fire? It was a full day before I got a chance to check YouTube for a video to determine if I was indeed cracked. Judge for yourself -- I think there are some definite similarities. I like this song, but will never, ever, ever be able to hear it without picturing Michael Pare in his leather jacket. Not sure that was what SwissT intended. [SNAP! YouTube has the Foo Fighters covering Keep the Car Running!]

7. On Call by Kings of Leon. Love these southern rocking hirsute hotties. Hadn't heard this song before, but plan to make my next crush sing it to me in bed. Seriously. There aren't that many lyrics to learn....

8. No I in Threesome by Interpol. Isn't that the truth? Sorry, I digress. I don't own any Interpol, but find this one pleasant enough. Definitely atmospheric. "babe it's time we give something new a try." So true.

9. Two More Years (MSTRKRFT remix) by Bloc Party. Another indie darling from the pages of Rolling Stone that has gone unheard by me. I was concerned by the remix addendum. Neighbor John is a house music aficionado (disco by any other name would thump as loudly, sayeth JamieShakespeare) and when the repetitive thumping beat is escaping his windows, I marvel that it rarely changes from song to song. So, to get back on the recap track, this is the song when I have a sip of coffee, give Boom a biscuit, and check my cell phone for messages. Nice upbeat background music but even after repeated listens, I couldn't tell you one lyric.

10. Fluorescent Adolescent by Arctic Monkeys. LOVE the Monkeys first US release and am now resolved to get off my butt and pick up Favourite Worst Nightmare album posthaste. Certainly has to be one of the best opening lyrics ever: "You used to get it in your fishnets, now you only get it in your night dress." Please let that not be a prophecy.

11. Sheila by Jamie T. Hands down the best revelation on the cd. I have been singing the chorus since the first play. If you go to Jamie T's website, you can hear an excellent cover of A New England. {moment of silence for Kirsty MacColl, gone before her time, who did the best cover of that Billy Bragg tune} I don't know if SwissT included this song because he thought I would like it or because Jamies love other Jamies, but it was a genius move on his part. Well played, sir!

12. Heavyweight Champion of the World by Reverend & the Makers. The Two of SwissT's One-Two punch! Great lyrics (see post title), excellent beat (gym song extraordinaire), and flat out excellent. A glance at their tour list on the band website reveals they haven't been stateside yet. On the plus side, I should definitely be able to swing front row if they do tour, being so ahead of the curve and all.

13. Slow Show by The National. Initial thought was how much the singer sounds like Brad Roberts from the Crash Test Dummies. A little too slow for my taste, but a good song. Apparently The National has been on David Letterman and is touring with R.E.M. this summer. So now I know.

14. When Under Ether by PJ Harvey. Thank goodness I got Polly Jean and not Tori (mix cds invariably have Tori. sigh). I have a few of PJ's albums and she is reliable if you are in an arty dark-ish mood. Not my regular cup of tea, but nice to have in the cupboard for the proper occasion.

15. Behave by Charlotte Hatherley. Never heard of her. Has a bit of a Voice of the Beehive vibe to my mind. YouTube had another one of her songs Bastardo that is kind of fun too. I'm not rushing out to buy the album, but I'm singing along.

16. Loughborough Suicide by The Young Knives. Good segue song from previous track, tune wise. "I will never go down fighting." That's your choice, buddy. Me, I'm a kicker and screamer.

17. Mathematics by Cherry Ghost. Not my favorite subject, nor my favorite song. A little too floaty, but then maybe SwissT was easing me off this musical journey gently. Doesn't make me reach for the skip button, so that's something.

So, in summation, should SwissToni ever decide to send out a monthly (quarterly? annual?) sampler cd to his readers/paying public, I would be first in line. High Fidelity indeed.

Tell all your single friends, try some new music today!

XO, JamieSmitten

Thursday, March 06, 2008

I'm Such A Joiner

As a distraction from what's been going on in my life lately (see post below), I submitted a post from my blog (not post below) for possible inclusion in a collection called "You're Not The Only One."

To wit:

We would like you to submit (to us at a
written piece about something you've been through from any aspect of your life
that you want to share. It can literally be about anything: your relationships,
your past, a road not taken, being a parent, an illness or your regrets etc.
We've called it "You're Not The Only One" to reflect the camaraderie of
blogging.Proceeds will go to

Read more here. The good news is that the date for submissions has been extended to Sunday, March 9. So share the fun and comb your archives for something good for a good cause.

Tell all your single friends to share their words with the world.

XO, JamieSmitten

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Requiescat In Pace

My father died on Friday, February 29, at 4:35 p.m. I was there when he took his last violent breaths. We were both ready for his body to give up the struggle. He spoke to me for the last time a few days before and had said several times that he wanted to die, he just needed to know how.

My sister thinks he waited until February 29th to die so the anniversary of his death would only happen every four years.

My father and I didn't always see eye to eye, but I loved him. He loved me too, in his way.

Goodbye, one-legged Dad.