[Note: I LOVED going to the Toronto Science Museum when I was a kid and have enjoyed the science museum in Richmond as well. How was I to know a children's museum would be so different?]
Well let me just tell you, children's museums are no different than the dog park. My evidence? Read on:
- Pack mentality rules. If one dog races over to the water bowl, 11 others follow. If one child picks up a bucket to collect plastic "apples" pneumatically shooting out of tubes, every other child will go to the same side of the four sided apple tree and fight over the one apple that came out on that side. And what kind of life skill is apple picking anyway? Seriously, that would not be a good career bet in Richmond.
- Fancy bows in the hair mean trouble. The sissy dogs with bows are always the ones that pick a fight and then run yelping back under their owner's feet when a dog even barks at them. Similarly, the little princesses with bows in their hair attempt to control all in their immediate domain. In the cafeteria section, one little despoTina commandeered every piece of fake cake and plastic sundae and screamed bloody murder when another child came near. Yes, I took a plastic sundae when she looked the other way. Sue me.
- Repetitive actions are more fun if you are under 7 years of age. Older dogs will chase the ball a few times, but it takes a young dog to retrieve for hours. This children's museum has a pretend grocery store and checkout line. I watched in ever growing horror as the children picked boxes off the shelf, stood in line, and watched passively as another child rang up their purchases. There wasn't even play money. It was like a Stepford mini-mart.
- Look where you walk. Pretty standard rule at the dog park considering the varied manner of canine output. But would you expect it at the children's museum? Stickers, discarded on the museum floor, are amazingly resilient and survive the car ride home and a walk to the ice cream store before affixing themselves to the oriental rug in the foyer. There's some sand issues too and some sort of kitty-litter-like substance that covers the dinosaur bones in the excavation pit.
Tell all your single friends, hold out for the science museum.
XO, JamieSmitten
1 comment:
That kitty-litter stuff is actually pulverized rubber. It's a heck of a lot easier to clean off the little ones than sand (as long as they're not wearing corduroy pants).
Alastair loves the Children's Museum. He's too young right now to understand the social aspects of it, and really just enjoys the (relatively) safe environment or crawling and climbing all over stuff. Plus, there are race cars.
Your mileage may vary.
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